The other day a student asked me: “Are you for or against the gays?” Questions and comments like this come up a lot at the high school where I teach. It makes me very glad that I am not a gay teen at my school. It also makes me want to provide students struggling with gender and sexual identity a safe space at school.
Earlier this school year the national news was flooded with stories of gay teens in high schools and colleges who were bullied and taunted to the point where they killed themselves. People were shocked. Or were they? Kids will bully each other about anything. Any difference, anything that stands out about anyone suddenly becomes fodder for teasing.
The difference with the bullying of LGBT teens is that many of the adults in their lives are likely to not stand up for them. Teachers may feel uncomfortable standing up for a student. Many teachers who are members of the LGBT community don’t even feel comfortable being out at work. It’s just a fact, that unless you live in a city or a state that has anti-discrimination laws for sexual minorities, that you can be terminated from your job for being out. If adults, especially educators are living with this fear, how are teens handling it? Some adults may even agree with the bullies, thinking that students need to be called out for being gay, that it is something wrong with the student.
At my public charter school, so many are influenced by their conservative churches that teachers will tell their students being gay is a sin. Some will reinforce the negative messages students already have towards their gay classmates.
Living in the culture we do, it is reassuring that things like the It Gets Better project exist. Inspired by a national tragedy Dan Savage and his partner Terry Miller started a YouTube social movement. They asked for videos from members of the LGBT community and their supporters explaining to teens that there is hope. From politicians like Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton, to Ellen DeGeneres, Al Franken and members of clergy from a variety of religions came videos reassuring teens. The message was overwhelmingly a positive one. LGBT youth should realize that what seem like insurmountable odds today will get better in the future. There is hope that teens will one day be able to create their own community of supportive friends and family. Even if at this moment things are not in their favor, eventually things in their lives will get better.
Savage and Miller started the Web site www.itgetsbetter.org with the goal of getting 100 videos to let LGBT teens that they were not alone. It lets them know that others had struggled like them and found normal lives with friends, family, and supportive communities.
The results were astounding. The site was created in September 2010. Two months later the site had more than 10,000 videos and more than 35 million site visits. The It Gets Better movement shows the power that social media has. Without knowing how to use the Internet to get their message out, there wouldn’t have been all those videos posted or visitors to the Web site. There would be no book, full of reassurance and support available to young people who need it the most.
As I prepare to catalog It Gets Better and add it to my school library’s collection, I’m glad Savage and Miller were tech-savvy enough to start this movement. It provides a valuable resource to teens who feel they don’t fit in and have nowhere to turn. This is a book that should be in every high school (and middle school) library in the U.S. The Web site is a resource anyone can access to feel included in a community of caring individuals.
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